What's black and twelve inches long? A Maglite.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What happens when you murder someone? The Government murders you.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

*prepares this to get negged*

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What is better than a cat? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

thumb_up thumb_down +48

what happened to the boy who crossed the street. he got shot by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Davey Peterson.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Whats the differense between a pile of dead babies and a Farrari I actually have a Farrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

why is Justin Berber gay? hes not thats rust a myth

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A black man walks into a bar and is proptly told to leave. He proceeds to sue the bar owner, then buys the bar and turns it into a community center that helps at risk children.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black

thumb_up thumb_down +42

why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped his mother

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the person with down syndrome do? He mumbled for a while, chewed on his thumb, fell flat on his face, and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

if i had a nickel for every time iv typed an anti joke... i would have $0.15

thumb_up thumb_down +40

why does the man appear fat he is

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

thumb_up thumb_down +40

knock knock who's there Berry Joe Berry Joe who? I just told you, Berry Joe. oh.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

5

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops