Q: What do you call a white guy cooking a dinner? A: A chef

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

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What's harder nailing 10 babies to 1 tree... Or nailing 1 baby to 10 trees???

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What did the rapist say to the woman? "If you tell anyone I'll kill you!"

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whats softer than a furry blanket an indian

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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whats worse than hitler? Anti-Jokes By darragh hamilton

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Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

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2 out of 4 questions. How do you get an elephant in a fridge? Open it, take the girrafe out, put the elephant in, and close it.

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A platypus walks into a bar, and was the only mammal in the building capable of laying an egg.

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What did the heart surgeon say to the brain surgeon? We are both surgeons

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Roses are Red Toilets are Blue Get out of Me way I Need to POO!

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have alzheimer's Bacon

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What do you call this? A sentence in English.

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What do you do with a pickle jar full of semen? Use it for gel, because it took so long to collect it all, and you're frugal person who believes in recycling.

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you had me at "hello", no need to add "you're under arrest"

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Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

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What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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Why did the Dentist recommend Oral B? He had been paid by the company and thus legally bound to do so.

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Q: Why can't white people dunk? A: because they can't jump high enough

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How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun

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So, a giraffe walks into a bar and orders six martinis and shame on for wanting a punch line this giraffe needs help.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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