There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

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ROSES ARE RED WATCHES ARE GOLD GET ON YOUR KNEES AND DO WHAT YOUR TOLD

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Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

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A. Your mamma is so stuiped she starved to death in a grocary store.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four in the seats, twenty six in the ash tray, and thirty in the gas chamber.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What do black people and apples have in common? They are both fruit... except for black people

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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What's green has eight legs, and would kill you of it fell on you from the top of a tree? A Billiard table

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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I have Alzheimer. What?

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what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

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Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

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Spinabifita

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Lady Gaga didn't have anything to wear to the playboy party.

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Hey Shea

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

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hey guys what's up?

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Why do the piglets have their heads down low? Because they are ashamed that their mom is fat.

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What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops