Horton Hears... Rape and violence and doesn't do anything about it.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

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water, hydrated silica, glycerin, sorbitol, PVM/MA copolymer, sodium lauryl sulfate, flavor, cellulose gum, sodium hydroxide, propylene glycol, carrageenan, sodium saccharin, titanium dioxide all adds up to colgate. SO AS A MATTER OF FACT, CHEESE PLUS PIE IS CHICKEN. CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT I LIKE SAYING CHEESE, JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL BECAUSE THEY WERE BAGELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

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Wow did you see stevie wonder's new house. neither has he

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What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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What do you call 6 dead people on your front lawn? A mass murder

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Knock Knock! Who's there? What do you mean... we have been having a conversation for a half hour now... that's your name you idiot, Knock Knock!

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. I ate it.

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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7

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

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What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

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What do you call a Fish without the I? Astyanax mexicanus, or the Blind Cave variant of the Mexican tetra

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Your mom is soooo fat..... She'll most likely suffer a heart attack

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Knock knock Who's there? You're adopted.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the same wolf that had devoured the chickens' chicks singlehandedly was chasing it.

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a guy walked into my house and asked "why do you do the beep test every arvo?" i suddenly replied, im matt minors i get chicks

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

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Q: Wgat did Batman say to Robin before Robin got in the car? A: "Robin, get in the car"

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a dick you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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