Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

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I walked into a bar and it hurt because it was metal

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Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass...! I said "ass" a lot, sorry for the language

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Stop shitting in my garden

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what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

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What do you call an Arab on a plane? A passenger, you racist!

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. Because, often, friends go out together in social situations.

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Straight men can be bronies.

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A Grape Soda inside a Chicken inside a Watermelon. Blackception.

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I am on a escalator.

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

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Hearpin my durp

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What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

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Why did the bus driver get arrested? Because he hijacked the bus.

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What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

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What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

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why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

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A Elephant was going to fight against the biggest and toughest and meanest giant African desert mouse! The battle the animal kingdom had waited for centuries! *DING!* Elephant: Get up Mickey! Mouse: Squish! Disney: How big do you really think a African "giant" desert mouse is?

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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