Q. What did the man say when his car broke down. A. Damn it, my car broke down.

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why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

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Roses are Red, Blues are Violets, Have I Dyslexia, F**k.

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Why is Billy in a ditch? He stepped on a landmine and was promptly burst into many pieces. The ditch was coincidental.

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why did one crayon give another crayon the silent treatment? because they are crayons, unable to speak

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

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Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

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Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

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What did the black kid get for his birthday? Yo bike!

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Knock Knock Who's there? A bag of burning crap.

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You're Adopted.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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There's a car about to hit me.

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Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses can also be white And violets can also be purple

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What kinds of children go to heaven dead ones

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Whats the XBOX JUAN's most popular game. Call of Juarez!!!

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What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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