What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was a registered 6 offender

What do you call someone with no legs nor arms? Mat

Yo sugars so salty when you put it on your french fries they taste like salty french fries

why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

What is the most important thing to have during a zombie apocalypse? Oxygen.

What's meaner than taking candy from a baby? Throwing the baby off a cliff.

Make little things count Teach midgets math

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

A:why did sam fall of the wing ? B:why ? A:she had no arms. B:... A:knock knock. B: who is there ? A:not sam

Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

Have you heard the one about the Norwegian? He killed 98 people.

What's worse than dropping you ice-cream cone? Signing your post on Anti-joke.com

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

Comedy.

why did the puppy poop? he had too

What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

It's only racist if you consider them people.

What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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