A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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What sentence on this site is the biggest cause of forever alone. "No comments yet. Be the first"

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You can have it.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

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How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

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What is grey and smells like sand? A Rock.

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Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

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Life is an elephant, get married.

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Why do babies cry on airplanes? Because gay people are getting married.

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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Yo momma so fat, people snicker as they walk past her, quietly laughing at a women obviously struggling with obesity. They then proceed to stop laughing, as they realize that their mother died from diabetes. They then proceed to move on with their day.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Billy Cundiff.

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Why didn't Steve finish his homework? He didn't want to.

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

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What kind of sex do you have with twenty seven year olds any kind you want there are twenty of them

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ask the starving African.

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Why did a boy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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