Anthony Dephillips is handsome

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

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Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not having an apple to find a worm im

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Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

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Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

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A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

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Nock Nock It's open.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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why did the monkey fall out the tree? he lost his grip

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What did the black kid get for his birthday?

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A guy has cancer. He dies.

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Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

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Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

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Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

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...this makes a cop throw a car and then call "inception!"

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Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

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What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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