A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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.ellipsis { text-overflow: ellipsis; /* Required for text-overflow to do anything */ white-space: nowrap; overflow: hidden; }

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not having an apple to find a worm im

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How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

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Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

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Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

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Nock Nock It's open.

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A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

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A guy has cancer. He dies.

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A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

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why did the monkey fall out the tree? he lost his grip

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What did the black kid get for his birthday?

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What sentence on this site is the biggest cause of forever alone. "No comments yet. Be the first"

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You can have it.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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Q: What do you call a black hitchhiker? A: A hitchhiker

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Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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