If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

Person 1 : i need to sneeze Person 2 : ok ( person 1 sneezes ) Person 2 : bless u ( few seconds later ) did u sneeze? Person 1 : yep :)

A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

Q: Why are lizards broke? A: Because they run around the desert with no money.

How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

roses are blood violets are veins vampires are crazy and you are insane

Jersey Shore

Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

WHY DID THE CHICKEN FART SO LOAD TO GET EVRYYBODY ATENTION

What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

What did the 10 year old luekemia patient get for christmas? Dead parents

sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

Q:what do you call a black man flying a plane? A: a pilot

Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

Samantha

please dis this joke, I want to get to the bottom of the leaderboard!

A Jewish man died in a car crash. His family mourned his death throughout the next few years.

hey bill!

Where did Susie go after the bombing? Everywhere

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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