Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

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Why was the black man a victim of racial prejudice? because he was black

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why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

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An Asian walks out of the library.

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Justin Bieber walked into a gay-bar, The whole world applauded.

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What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

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What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

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Guess what I did to the clown I hit it with an axe

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what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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A man met a genie that granted him three wishes. I wish I could fly. The genie gave him a plane ticket. No, I want to really fly for real! The genie put him inside a plane. Okay, I wish I was unable to die then! The genie killed him. Moral: Not every story needs to make a fucking sense.

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What's the best way to look 10 pounds thinner? Lose 10 pounds

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

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What do you call someone with no legs nor arms? Mat

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Two men are sitting on a park bench discussing the anatomy of goats. Where is Bertha? Teaching the principals of mathematics to blind orphins in Moscow, Russia.

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ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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