What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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whats brown and sticky? a four week dead uunborn african child...

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What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? They have the same middle name.

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What's big, yellow, and can't swim? A school bus.

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why were Tamika and Tyron afraid to get into the water? They weren't

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Why Did The Black Guy Eat Watermelon? Because he lives in south africa where they are commonly grown and needed a healthy snack.

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person 1:Dude, look at the news person 2:Yea man, its D ick Cheney person 1: what a d ick head

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Dear emma brown i would appreciate if i could have my dick back, the you squeezed of wwith you ass cheeck -jackson edwards

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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What did Frodo do when he realized that he needed to destroy the ring? He simply walked into Mordor

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Why did Suzie fall off her swing? She was dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What happened to the boy who ditched his friends and lied to them...? His appendix exploded.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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Maturity is a virtue.

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A black teenager drives an Escalade His father is a prominent lawyer and his mother is a neuroscientist.

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Hey! do you have any updog? Nothing much! you?

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What do you call a man who rides on unicorns? A liar. Unicorns don't exist.

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what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

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Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

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A terrorist walks into a bomb shop. He soon realizes he's in the wrong shop, leaves and goes on with his day.

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Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

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A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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