What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

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How do you stop an alcoholic from drinking ? You leave him in the desert for 4 days, eventually he'll die from dehydration .

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

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What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

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How did Princess Diana cross the road? Through the windshield

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What do u get when u mix a dinosaur and a lesbian? A-lick-alot-a-puss

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How do you make a plummer angry? Kill his family

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Is this where I type the joke?

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

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What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

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why do you care?

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how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

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What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

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In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

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Man: I'm just popping out to get cigarettes (He never returns.)

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What do you call a black man at the head of the U.S.? A mistake.

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Omg its that superman nope chuck testa

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Your mums a penis joke.

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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It was a dark night, I was walking home from the shops in town, The wind was whistling through my damp hair, My spine tingled and i tucked my hands under my stinking pits. I felt like someone was watching me, I walked faster the breath was warm on my kneck i turned around. It was gary glitter he pulled down my pants and gave me the best sucky i ever had. We kissed and i tasted the cheese from my knob. In all garry glitter has a giant knob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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