What do you call a Jew and a black mans offspring? A human

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You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a dick you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now,

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Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

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What do you a call a person who can't fly. A person.

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

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My phone rang. So I answered it.

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How do u get a clown off of a swing? You hit him with an axe.

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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Jews... The only funny thing they did was piss off Adolf Hitler

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After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

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A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

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A man made a sandwich.

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Why did the black lady yell? She was being raped.

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Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

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Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

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Woman rights.

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Why was 97 afraid of 98? Because 98,99, 100!

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What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

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Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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