If there are 3 apples, and Johnny takes away 3 of them, how many apples does Johnny have? None, because Johnny got hit by a train.

What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

What's large, green, and pissed off? The dumpster out back

What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

69

Whats worse than finding a bad anti-joke on this website? Dieing of Genital Warts

My nigga so racist he killed a man cause he was white.

colby doesnt shave

Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

Once upon a time, I was a Muslim.

bob saget

Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

ecks! why zee?

why are you people on anti-joke? BECAUSE you have NO LIFE !

5

I walked into a bar and it hurt because it was metal

I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

What's purple and gross? Purple gross stuff

Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

What do you call an Arab on a plane? A passenger, you racist!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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