Knock Knock! Who's there? Penis... Okay...

Who won the race across the highway, the Mexican or the Frenchman? Neither, as they were struck by a mac truck when attempting to run across the highway and were both killed instantly on impact.

What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

what happened to the man with no arms or legs when he was pushed down a hill? nobody knows he is still going ........................................................................

Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

Yes!

Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

Your mom is so fat that when she went to the Doctors, He said she was slightly over weight

What do you call two black men in bed? Twix

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

Why did the chicken cross the road? No soap, radio!

Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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