Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

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Why did the chicken eat fried chicken? Because fried chicken is so good! Kelvin Yang.

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What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

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Straight men can be bronies.

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

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Hearpin my durp

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What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

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Four homosexuals walk into a bar. They notice that there's only one stool left at the bar itself. They sat at a table with four chairs. They had a delightful time.

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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A women president

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What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

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A man walked into a bar because he worked there.

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Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

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A Elephant was going to fight against the biggest and toughest and meanest giant African desert mouse! The battle the animal kingdom had waited for centuries! *DING!* Elephant: Get up Mickey! Mouse: Squish! Disney: How big do you really think a African "giant" desert mouse is?

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if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

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A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

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what happened to the 4 year old girl who got stuck in the freezer? She froze.

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What's the difference between dead babies and Christmas lights? I don't have Christmas lights hanging on my Christmas tree...

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I'm so hot my father calls me son.

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What do you call 12 black doctors in a dark room? 12 black doctors in a dark room.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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Your Mom.

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Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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