Two blondes are out for a walk when they come across some tracks, they realise they are train tracks and move out of the way to make sure they aren't hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Roses are red, white, pink, and many other colors. Violets similarly display many color variations due to generations of ardent florists.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What is better than a cat? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Their, they're, there You're, your

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red Voilets are blue I have a gun Get in the Van

thumb_up thumb_down +37

An Iraqi, an American and an Irishman get on a plane. They all enjoy the in-flight amenities, agree that the food was sub-standard and arrive at their destinations safely.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What's bigger than a volcano? A: Earth

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What happened to the lady with cancer?? She got shot!!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man walks into a doctors and says 'Doctor, Doctor, I have a bad stomach ache' Upon hearing this, the doctor writes the man a prescription for medication and wishes him a swift recovery.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Wanna know a funny word? Pickle-weasel.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops