- Anti Joke

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly shits on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common? A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.

What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

Whats worse then finding TWO worms in your apple? The Holocaust, it was pretty bad.

How do u get a baby to stop choking? Take ur c*ck out if its mouth!!!

What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

What did the engineer say to the supervisor? Hi.

What is the quickest way to a mans heart? Through his chest with a stick.

Why did the teacher yell at her students? The class was acting completely inappropriate and she felt it was necessary to discipline them so the current situation won’t repeat its self.

My grandmother always said "slow and steady wins the race."...... She died in a fire

Why did the cancer patient shave his head? He wanted to pretend he still had hair.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Its a bird...its a plane....it IS a plane

Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

I AM SO FAT I WANT TO EAT MORE FOOD. I NEED A DOCTOR BECAUSE IM GOING TO END UP LIKE YOUR MOM!

how many A.D.D. kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?lets go play!

You're smart... And I can tell a joke.

What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

An elephant walks into a bar..what the hell