What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple?

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"Happy Father's Day!" said the little boy to the old man. The old man broke out in tears because he had always wanted to be a father.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Q: What did the Kool-Aid Man say when he crashed through a wall? A: "OW! That hurt!"

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Yo mama's so fat that when she steeped on the scale, it read a rather large number as compared to the average, healthy weight of the human race. Of course, she could become thin by working out or eating less, but she chooses not to because of the laziness that has now corrupted her completely.

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what is the entire jewish population minus about 13 million? The Holocaust.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his tricycle? He was run over by a bus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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whats long and hard on a black man? his femur.

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"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

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It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

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What has 2 brown legs and 2 gray legs? An elephant with diarrhea.

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Knock Knock. Whose There? Lettuce. Thats impossible.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

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Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

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Do you know what is worse than getting kicked downstairs? Getting kicked upstairs because then you could fall downstairs and break your skull.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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Old guitars sound like cat's guts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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