A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why did so many white people vote for obama? They strongly believed in what he had to say, and believed he was the right person to lead our country during its troubled times.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Knock Knock. Whose There? Lettuce. Thats impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the black surgeon get fired? The hospital was low on funds due to the economic crisis, and had to let a few employees go.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

thumb_up thumb_down +41

8

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A fossil.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Behind every fat girl is a beautiful woman. No, seriously. Get out of the way.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's the difference between a baby and a mushroom? One is delicious, the other is a mushroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Me and my pet lion just took a trip to his homeland of africa. It is also worthwhile to note I'm a chronic liar.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How much does a polar bear way? Near 1,100 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

thumb_up thumb_down +39

terry stockton is straight

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops