A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

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Chuck Norris doesn't wait in traffic, he takes the subway

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

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An Indian man left a 20% tip after eating at the closest restaurant to him

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Why does smokey bears wife never have kids? Because every time she gets hot smokey beats he with a shovel

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Why did the man wear a blue shirt? He didn't. He wore a green one.

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If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

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What did Roadrunner name his car? Turbo Tax.

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John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "Hey, why the lost election?"

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What do you call two black men and a hispanic man in the back of a car? The punchline of this joke is offensive, and might bring legal troubles to Anti-Joke.Com and it's subsidiaries. For these reasons, Anti-Joke.Com will not allow it to be shown.

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A fifteen-year-old walks into a bar. He is told to leave by the tender because of his obvious prepubescent appearance, deeming him far from the legal age of drinking.

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An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

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why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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what does the black guy order for a drink at the bar. kool aid

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What does WTF stand for? Welcome to Facebook!

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Anti-joke.

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There once was a man in Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He awoke with a fright In the middle of the night To find that someone was breaking into his house

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Why can't you give a diabetic a cookie? Due to the lack of Insulin produced in the Pancreas, the sudden spike of sugar into the blood stream may send the person into a diabetic coma, which good possibly result in the amputation of a limb.

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Knock Knock Who's there? the mailman.

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What's funny about 4 black people going off a cliff in a Cadillac? Nothing. You're adopted

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a pleasant evening as they talk to each other about their day over a relaxing drink.

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religion.

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take out the f in way. there is no f in way. I see what you did there.

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Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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