What is worse than Justin Bieber? Well, 1. Deforestation 2. Hurricanes 3. Diabetes 4. Mass Murder ....and probably much more.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What do you get when you cross an intersection? Possibly a lower leg contussion, ACL tear, breaks in 4 different sections of your arm and lots of brain swelling if you are hit by a car.

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Bob: Hey bro Jim: ... Bob: You're dead! Jim: Yep.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot

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they say that if you commit suicide, you have done nothing wrong. does that mean hitler did nothing wrong?

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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What happens when you choke a smurf? Nothing, smurfs aren't real.

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What is red and doesnt exist? No-tomato.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Why did the man die? He got shot!

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What is green and looks like Grass? A painting of grass

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did the kind hearted wolf do when he saw the small, helpless, fluffy bunny? He ate it.

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Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

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what is worse tahn finding a worm in your apple? finding hitler in your house.

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How did th-A fridge.

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If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

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Two guys go hunting and one of them aims the sniper at the other guy's house and says "I see your wife's cheating on you again with another man" he replies "I've had it with her, shoot him in the privates and shoot her in the mouth" the friend says "I'll get that in one shot".

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

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A man walks in to a bar and says "ouch."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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