A man sees a clown, a robot, and a monkey walking down the street side by side. The man ponders the randomness of life.

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

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Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass...! I said "ass" a lot, sorry for the language

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muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

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A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

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Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a convicted serial killer.

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why did tom drop his ice cream he didn't because he had no icecream

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This sentence is false.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Some people like melon and others like soup.

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Have you heard the joke about the Swedish surgeon who found a frog in his patient's stomach? Yes, you've told me it before.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

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knock knock who's there interupting black woman interu- MMMMHHHHHMMMM

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How do you kill a mocking bird. Shoot it.

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obama leadership

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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