How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly 10 consecutive times in the head with a knife.

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guess what no i know what your thinking, its NOT chickenbutt. its that tomorrow i have a math test. that sucks.

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A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"

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What did the unicorn say when he was kicked out of the grocery store? Nothing, dodo birds dont exist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC.

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

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yo mamas so fat... she's a map on call of duty

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There was a man workin at the supermarket, when a cow with a hat entered. He realized that it couldn't be really happening and had to be a dream. Effectively: he was dreaming. Actually, he was in jail, and his execution was scheduled for that day.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

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all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

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Please Rape William Wright

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A black teenager drives an Escalade His father is a prominent lawyer and his mother is a neuroscientist.

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't rape, which her sister had experienced while traveling in 2007.

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What do you call a man who rides on unicorns? A liar. Unicorns don't exist.

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Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

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I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

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A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I am a dog

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

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Steve: Hey ask me if Im a Pelican. Bob: Are you a pelican? Steve: YES.

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How did the boy cross the road? He didn't he had polio.

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Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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