A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

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Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

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Kesley Ioannou not shopping.

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What's the difference between me and convicted pedophile? -The pedophile's been caught ;)

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Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Did you hear about the guy who came home one night and found his wife in bed with his best friend? He had just returned from a trip to the grocery store, where he'd purchased bread, milk, eggs, broccoli, yams, tea, and brownie mix.

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yo mama is so fat she is 1 candy bar away from dieing

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Why did the man walk into the bar? Because he wasn't looking where he was going

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Ask me if I'm a human! - Are you a human? No. The correct term would be a human being.

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Why did the Filipino man get small condoms? Because he's not black.

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What happens when you try to hand feed a shark You have one less hand

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What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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A hispanic walks down the street. ICE quickly arrests him, as he is here illegally. 5 months after deporting, he crosses the southern US border to try again.

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Me and me!!!! LOL! i'm a comedian!

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Whats bigger than a tuba? the universe.

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what's worst than being gay? being black

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter it's not going to come to you anyway.

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Where did Sally go when she exploded? Everywhere!

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? 10 dead trashcans in 1 baby

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what do you call gingers ugly.

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What's the deal with airline food?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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