How do you make a doctor cry? Kill his family.

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Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

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Why couldn't the old man read the street sign? Because there were no words. Just an arrow designating a trun up ahead.

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

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Why was the 45 year old man crying? He shit his pants.

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Who was the first person Steven Hawking runs up to when he finds out something new about science? He is in a wheelchair due to a condition called ASL, therefore he cannot "run"

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Q: What do you call a ginger with no soul? A: Common

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How do you stop an alcoholic from drinking ? You leave him in the desert for 4 days, eventually he'll die from dehydration .

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What did the police officer say to the black man? "I am a police officer."

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

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What did the guy say to the other guy? LOOK AT MY EYEBROWS!!!!!!!

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There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

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Remember when the whole country was sad because Marget Thatcher died? No, me neither.

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What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

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What's worse than having AIDS. Being Black.

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you are black i am black except for your big hairy ass

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What happened when the black guy looked up his family tree? He discovered long-forgotten relatives who had lived during difficult times for African-Americans in the United States and faced disenfranchisement, extrajudicial killings, and chattel slavery. His sense of racial consciousness and solidarity was thereby reinforced.

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larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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