a man walked into a bar.... when i say bar i mean a metal pole, the man suffered from concussion

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why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

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What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Why did the slut have white stuff on her mouth? Because she just ate ice-cream.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of it coop and there was something shinny on the other side of the street.

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Whats plastic and little boys turn it on? A game cube, and Michael Jackson. Well maybe not anymore since hes dead...

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What did the guy say to the other guy? LOOK AT MY EYEBROWS!!!!!!!

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What did Obama get at the bar? A shot... In the head.

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What's black and very long? The line-up at KFC.

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What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

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There is a man who is half black half Jewish. He walking up a hill really fast. What happens to him? Answer: The Jewish side of his body will fall off and the black side will walk away.

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How did the old man keep the kids off his lawn? By molesting their Moms.

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Why do Asians squint their eyes? They were born like that.

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what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

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Whats the best part about 23 year olds? Theres 20 of them

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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What do you get when you mix a panda,oklahoma,and a handle? The oklahoma panhandle.

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Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

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If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples how many pankackes can fit on the roof? Purple because alians do not wear hats./

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What do two siblings have in common? They both want the other to get hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops