you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

What do black people and apples have in common? They are both fruit... except for black people

69

A man comes to a fork in the road. He then looks around then proceeds to pick it up, puts it in his pocket, then continues walking down the road as if nothing had happened.

why did the chicken cross the road? It is impossible to tell because we cannot communicate with chickens, but we can assume there was something of interest over there.

Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

- How breakdance was invented? - A certain black man was trying to stole rims from moving car.

what do you do when a dog bites your ear off? you see that you are bleeding then you scream.

How do you get a fat man to drop a brownie? Make fun of him until he kills himself, and then drops the brownie.

how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

yo mama is so dumb she went to dr. dre for a pepsmear

What did the fat man do when someone told him he was fat? He kept eating, for he was deaf.

What did the monkey say to dog Foreskin

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems are pointless Refrigerator.

Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because he didn't have a face

Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

What's a pirate's favorite color? Depends on the pirate.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...