So a blonde woman gets into her car. She then drives to the grocery store because she is hungry and wants to buy food to make her dinner.

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What is the quickest way to a mans heart? Through his chest with a stick.

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penis

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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47

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Why did the vegetarian lose her foot? Diabetes.

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YEAH THEY DO.

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A bleeding zebra.

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how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

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What did the Batman say to the Joker? "I am the Batman."

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YES! EXACTLY!

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum is fat and so are you

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What do you call a guy who died in a stampede? Grandpa.

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baskets

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What do you tell a Woman with black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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What did the child rapist say to the little boy? I'm going to rape you.

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What is worse than running away from a rapist? Getting raped by a rapist.

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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#scabbers

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A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation. John was never the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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