Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

Hey my names cliff. You should drop by sometime

Q: Why are lizards broke? A: Because they run around the desert with no money.

ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

If you replace all the letters in your name with G A Y it spells Gay... your gay

What is invisible, weighs 332 pounds, runs 67.3 mph, is green, and is made by Jews in China. Nothing, if something is invisible, then it cannot reflect green light, therefore it cannot be green.

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. They both start to pee, and the white man looks over to the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the blackman's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels embaraased at his latent homosexuality. They both leave, never seeing eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

A man walks into a bar and sees a large jar filled to the brim with $20 bills. He asks the bartender why there is so much money in the jar, and the bartender tells him that he has a horse in the back of the building, and he has a bet that if someone puts $20 in the jar and can make the horse laugh, then they will win all the money. The man, feeling confident, puts his money into the jar and tries to make the horse laugh. It is a horse, so of course he cannot make it laugh. He leaves, dejectedly, having just wasted 20 of his hard earned dollers.

If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

What's black and white and red all over? A bloody zebra.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

How do you make a homeless man cry? you throw away his trash.

Knock, Knock Who's there ? So So who? No, So Lee

How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

Q:what do you call a black man flying a plane? A: a pilot

What do you call a homosexual in the army? A brave and honorable person who should be applauded for their service to this great nation

What do you call a girl with one leg at your door step? Ilean

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she got shot in the heart with a bolt action sniper rifle and died.

What is big, grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

Whats funny about the Holocaust? Absolutely nothing considering millions of people perished and you people think its funny!

What do you call a black man climbing a mountain. A mountain climber.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...