Your momma is so old, she has lived a wonderful, long life and witness a lot of human achievement.

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

Why did the black lady yell? She was being raped.

roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

two penguins are sitting in a bath tub. one penguin says, "hey, can you hand me the soap?" the other penguin says, "what do i look like, a typewriter?"

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

Why couldn't the blonde screw in the light bulb?? - she happened to be autistic

Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

What's green and has four wheel? A tractor.

maths is annoying!!! LIKE if you agree!!!!! :D

What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

Do u liek mudkipz GO TROLLING

What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

What did the orange elephant with 6 legs say? Kill me.

A Woman decides she wants to stop making sanwiches for her sexist boyfriend. She walks away and lives a happy life. In hell.

Give a man a fish, feed him for a week. Teach a man to fish, he'll starve to death. Provide this man a fishing rod, and now finally you're doing something helpful.

why did the jew cross the road? the ss was chasing him and his family to kill him so he ran across the street to same his family, he got hit by a truck and his family was killed...

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...