Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

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Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

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why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

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What's purple and gross? Purple gross stuff

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want a balloon? yeah

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What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

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what did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

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Heat oven to 375°. Grease 18 regular-size muffin cups (or 12 large size muffins). In bowl, mix butter until creamy. ... Add eggs one at a time, beating after each. Beat in vanilla, baking powder and salt. With spoon, fold in half of flour then half of milk into batter; repeat. Fold in blueberries.

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Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

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What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

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There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

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vagina, hehehehehehehe

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Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

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What did the carrot say when it was thrown out of an airplane? Nothing. It's a carrot.

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What is worse than spending time with in-laws? Nothing.

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Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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I TOOK A STEAMING SHIT ON YOUR MOM

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Why doesn't Michael J. Fox drive a stick shift? He was raised in an urban area and was only taught to maneuver with vehicles that shifted automatically.

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Chinese drivers.

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Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

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Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

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What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

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Silly Sally Dillydallied then lost her job to outsourcing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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