What did the man say to his wife at the funeral. Nothing, he was dead

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Sometimes I hope into bed and pretend I'm a carrot!!!!

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Where did the little girl go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

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Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

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Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

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What's ur favorite color? Cancer Made by mark

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Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

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A bar walks into a man... Wait...

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Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

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A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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Your mama is so fat she has a high BMI and is at a high-risk of Type II Diabetes.

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WHY DID THE WHITE MAN TALK TO THE BLACK MAN TO LIGHTEN HIM UP

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What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

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What is red and does not cry? Half a baby.

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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It was a warm summer day when justin beiber got hit by the bus everyone was cheering

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A white boy who just got jumped, with sever bruises left lying in a pool of his own blood.

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Did you know that if you stacked enough elephants to reach from the earth to the moon, all those elephants would die?

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Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

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if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

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On a scale from Casey Anthony to Sandusky, how much do you like children?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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