Q: What happened when Bob the Super-mega-ultra man, in his hurry to return an item that was objectively proven to be hazardous to physically normal people, banged his head very hard against a wall of a random building that was located on his route of travel? A: He recieved a concussion and had to coalesce in bed for a long time in order to return back to his regular style of living. Bob was merely a nominal 'Super-mega-ultra' man. He gets hurt practically as easily as anyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

First person: Knock, knock. Second person: Who's there? First person: You know. Second person: 'You know' who? First person: O.O LORD VOLDEMORT!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Mum: Never put off for tomorrow what can be done today. Child: Oh, I was going to play video games tomorrow, so...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whose better then Sarah, Georgia and ellie NO ONE!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call an Arab on an airplane? A passenger.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did the one handed man cross the road? to get to the secondhand shop.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem makes no sense FIRETOE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

u know y blondes and tornadoes r so alike? first theres a lot of blowing and sucking, and then u lose ur house!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why is MLA important? Because if Mothers didn't Love Anyone society would collapse and we would go into a nuclear war and blow up the earth, and the apocalypse would happen and dinosaurs would rule once again until another meteor hits the earth.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the teacher say to the pupil who was bad at maths? You are bad at maths and will never complete any sum EVER!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock Who's there? No one. You're imagining things.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Gorden Brown.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many spiders dose it take to cover a wall? Four, if they are 7 feet tall

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the slut have white stuff on her mouth? Because she just ate ice-cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops