Penis

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

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Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

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There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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A man walks outside and walks back in. Why? Because it was raining purple unicorns and he felt the need to go back inside.

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A Jew, a Mormon, and an Atheist walk out of a bar. They all get in a car with the Jew driving. They were all deceased do to the fact of a very large car accident. Know your limits. Don't drink and drive!

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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Why doesn't Rosa Parks eat bacon? Because she's dead.

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What happened to the starving african kid? He died

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Q: What do you call a white guy cooking a dinner? A: A chef

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A man walks into a bar. He recieves a concussion and dies of internal bleeding 3 hours later.

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What is the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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what glows blue and howls at the moon at midnight? I dont know but i had sex with your mother.

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Is this where I type the joke?

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Men, get on the boat.

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Q.whats the differecne between a bicycle? A. orange,...a vest dont got no sleeves.

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So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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