What did the cat say to the dog? Nofin Eejit.

Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them..

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

Q: What's the best way to get a woman to stalk talking? A: Ask them nicely.

What did the man say when he lost all his hair? Man: My life has been getting worse and worse ever since I developed cancer.

why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

What kind of sex do you have with twenty seven year olds any kind you want there are twenty of them

Why did the parrot fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What's funnier than 24? 25

An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

Where do astronaut cows go? Nowhere. There's no such thing as an astronaut cow.

Jacob Edwards has friends

wuts the diference between a black guy and arab? black guy kills whitye guy arab lijkes black guy (no jews or **** thou)

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh damn I'm blind.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

skurfboards we love fat kids

Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

Whats red and hurts when you bite into it? A brick.

What's the difference between Hitler and Kim Jong Il? Hitler's German

what if i told you that leonardo decaprio didnt need an oscar but an oscar needed a leonardo decaprio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(_)_)=============D

How do you get a jew out of an empty pool? Give him a lader

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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