how do you get a black guy out of a tree? ask himnicely and if he doesn't promptly call the fire department

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Knock, Knock Who's there ? So So who? No, So Lee

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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

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Why do flamingos hold up one leg?f If they held up two they'd fall down.

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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A walrus walks into a bar

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What word does almost everyone spell wrong? Wrong.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex.

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How many hearts does a jellyfish have? None.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Shut up.

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Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

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Penis

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What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

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Why did the vegetarian lose her foot? Diabetes.

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A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

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roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

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Q. how do you get 50 babies into a bowl? A. blender Q. how do you get them out of the bowl? A. Doritos

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When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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What is black, white, and red all over? A person who has black, white, and red paint on his or her body.

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What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

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hi

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How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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