An enormous black man wearing a durag walks into a bar. Due to the diverse and friendly comminuty he lives in, nobody judges him on his race, ethnicity, or culture. He goes on to pursue his career in business and gets a Masters Degree in Business Administration. He get's a job as an IT Director for a very successful business and he marries a well educated woman. They have 2 kids, but one of them is diagnosed with "Ondine's Curse" and dies in it's sleep. Distressed, and mourning the death of his newborn son, he seeks help from his parents. Regardless of his parents comforting and loving attitude towards him, he goes into the inner city smoking and selling illegal drugs like crack. He even got into cocaine and marjuana. 4 and a half years later, he was about to attempt suicide, when he saw his only living son, whom he loved with all his heart, walk into the room with his teddybear. He just looked at him, and he looked back. Suddenly, the father started crying. Flashbacks started playing though his mind of his happy life he was steadily pursuing. "why me?" He constantly thought to himself. What did he do to deserve this? 7 years in the future. The father was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Right before his death, he asked to talk to his son. "Son, listen to me. Never try to comtemplate the world we live in, it's too spontaneous and insane to understand. This world can either give you bliss or depression. Nothing inbetween. And most people who make there way up to the top eventually will fall. What goes up must come down. Ha... I never thought I'd be talking to me own son giving him a silly lecture in a deathbed. But just look at me..."the father gets very muddled and disoriented* "...Son. They say most of us have a good reason to live. Well don't most of us have a good reason to die too?" Malik Cartwright died on March 22, 1999. His son went on to legally change his middle name to "Leek", after his father's nickname. He went on to get the same Master's Degree that his father received, and had kids of his own. The whereabouts of the mother are unknown.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I like to rape cats.

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i have yougurt with tractor

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What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

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How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Orange" "Oh, hey."

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Why did sam and jolanda drop their pudding? They got hit by a flying tree.

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? The same amount as white people, stop being racist.

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Why did Jimmy's sexy teacher ask him to stay behind after class? His grades have been slipping and she expects better from her students. How anyone views her sexually is of no relevance to this situation.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Vodka is less Than dinner for two

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What happened when the Mexican man contracted the muscles of his large bowel after a large meal? Shit made its way to his anus

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Q: What do you call a black preist? A: Father

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What's worse than tieing a baby to a moving fan? Stopping it with a shovel

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A friend of yours tells you his version of The Aristocrats. You just wasted about 5-20 minutes of your life.

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Q: What did the dumb blonde say when she opened a box of Cheerios? A: Look! Donut seeds!

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What made people stop likeing Ice tea? Ice-T

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whoa there

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What did the prostitute say to the nun? It's nice to see you again, Sister.

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What did the homeless man give his friends for Christmas? More AIDS.

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Why did the child cry? It was beat up and thrown in a trashcan.

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There were 4 black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff. The sad thing was it was a nice car.

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What do you have when you take the gun, badge and uniform away from a cop? A man in his underwear.

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What did the blonde say to the brunette? I'm sorry your brother died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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