Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face", the horse said nothing; because it is a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Jerry.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the officer say to the black man? You're under arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Is this where I type the joke?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

porn-hub

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? How did the chicken get out of the henhouse?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

knock knock whose there? my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what is worse than finding a worm in your apple the earth exploding

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Do you know why children in Africa don't read Harry Potter too much? Because they can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Kesley Ioannou not shopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: Why was Sally crying? A: Because someone punched her in the face

thumb_up thumb_down -9

yo mama is so fat she is 1 candy bar away from dieing

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the man with cancer do? Die

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Where did Sally go when she exploded? Everywhere!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops