what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

So snoop dog drank some milk! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +43

"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

thumb_up thumb_down +43

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

0123456789

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Hgiugsf s8dyfgc sdyhgd©•øˆ????ª•†®???ßßs cdiug dvyg 34t5 fd87 vrry utgg erug 46 5gtyrue fVTU? Tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

So a man is sitting at a bar with about 20 girls sitting all around him. Amazed at this man's ability to pick up girls, another man asked him how he did. In response, the man said, "What?". The man wasn't able to hear the other man, due to the fact that there were many girls talking.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's the square root of 69? 8.3

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why didn't the blonde go to the party? Her depression finally got the best of her and she shot herself

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? This isn't a car

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

ecks! why zee?

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Look at that bitches asss!!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

thumb_up thumb_down +37

have you seen Stevie Wonders house? Nope. oh well sorry for bothering you

thumb_up thumb_down +37

myspace

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Your mamas so fat. She fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was the man sweating? He was stuck in a burning house.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops