A man walks into a bar, and has to go to the hospital because he broke his nose.

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There were 4 black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff. The sad thing was it was a nice car.

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What do you call a black man with a job? An employee

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to properly balance himself.

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Snooki

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why don't people like this joke? It makes no sense.

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what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

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there are rumors about monkeys liking bananas but that is a common misconception because if you take bananas divided by elephant times chalkboards you find that they like 0.9 lead from pencils that is aged from 1927

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A black man, a white man, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The bartender kicks them out because he doesn't have time for another crappy joke; as the bar is very crowded that night.

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Knock Knock Who's there? ... No one, you have Schizophrenia

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Whyd the girl fall of her bike? She rode over a curb

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why did the kid get in trouble. Because he put this up in typing class -charles hall aka chuckles

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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A Jew throwing a dime into a wishing well? Highly unlikely.

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Why did the boy scream? Because his girlfriend poked him in the butthole, which he was not expecting. Thus surprising him.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? There are many circumstances that could affect the outcome of the situation. One of them is whether or not the given people have or will soon obtain a ladder. In this case, the lightbulb could take more time than needed to be screwed in and effectively changed. Another key factor in the situation is the number of people. If there are enough people to reach the ceiling without a ladder, the lightbulb could be screwed in sooner or later than asked by the owner of the facility in which the lightbulb socket is installed. Finally, the height of the persons given is a crucial point in this situation. The people may be tall, thus allowing there to be fewer people needed. The people could be short and need a greater number of people than if the people were, perhaps, a bit taller. All in all, I'd say about 1-2.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the dog that was chasing it.

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Why does matt daly get confused for? A Penis

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "What's up?" The man replies, "The opposite of down."

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What did the prostitute say to the nun? It's nice to see you again, Sister.

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What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Why do they give old people Viagra at nursing homes? Because erectile function decreases with increasing age, and it would be unfair to needlessly deny senior citizens the right to consensual intercourse if that is what they want.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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