Your mother is so stupid that she has trouble discerning certain facts from fiction.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A black teenager drives an Escalade His father is a prominent lawyer and his mother is a neuroscientist.

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Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

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What happened when the turtle rolled over on his back? It proceeded to die because it couldnt find a way to roll over. An African tribe then decided to make the recently decised turtle into a delicious soup that lasted him and his family three days.

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What did the dead Catholic say to Atheist? Nothing. Dead guys can't talk!

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Why is there milk on the stairs? Did the cow leak again?

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They say there is safety in numbers Tell that to six million jews

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What is worse than having sex with a dead baby in front of it's mother? Not a lot.

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Knock Knock. Whose There? Lettuce. Thats impossible.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

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A man walk into a bar he buys a few drinks. When he is done the bar tender gives him his check. Man told the bar tender he has no money to pay for it. Bartender says," ok how about this we have a horse in the back that hasn't laughed a day in his life if you can make him laugh you get the drinks for free." so man proceeds to do so. A few minutes later man comes out horse is dying. So the man gets his drink for free. A few days later man comes back with the same deal. So the bartender tells him" that horse hasn't stopped laughing since you went back there. If you can make him stop you get your drinks for free." Man goes in a few minutes later comes out horse is crying. Man man is remarked by how he did it but he doesn't question it. A few days past the man comes back an the horse is still crying...... So the bartender ask the man how he did..... Man says," first I told him I had a bigger dick then him....second time I proved it"

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

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What's a small person? A midget

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why is Justin Berber gay? hes not thats rust a myth

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what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

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Why did sally break her arm? A piano fell on her

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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A black guy and a few other white guys steal a keg. They then proceed to have an awesome party consisting of extreme inebriation and a massive orgy.

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Terrorist walked into the bar, all dead, except for a small child. The police came and asked the boy: "Boy, how I survived the blast?" The boy answered: "I'm not a boy, I am broccoli"

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

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Let's see how many dislikes this can get!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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