I took a dump in a well don't ask me i'll never tell i look to u as it fell and now its in the well Hey,i just took a dump and it smells like crazy so here's my number so call the plumber Call the plumber

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A Jew walks into a bar The bar owner looks at a gang of punks in the back and shouts "YOU! GET OUT!" The Jew leaves the bar.

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Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

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Which side of a chicken has more feathers? The outside.

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A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

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"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

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What did the colonel say to the soldier before he got into the army tank? Get in.

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Knock-knock who's there? interrupting cow interupting cow who? moo.

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Who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a tiger? Considering that they live in different habitats, the chances are very unlikely that they would ever interact.

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Q: I have 2 dogs. Why? A: I like dogs

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Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

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What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

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What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.

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Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says to the other: "Maybe we should rethink our ways of life and realize why animals are on this planet"

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Dick spice

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how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

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The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

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Why did the bus crash? Because the driver was a watermelon.

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JLo made a song about my diick- "On the Floor"

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Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops