Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

How tall is the grass in Germany? ZIS HIGH! *put hand about an inch and half off the ground* I mow it about every ozher week

What do you call a man who has Alzheimer's? Wait what am I doing?

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

Yo mama is so ugly, she entered an ugly contest and placed well in her division.

it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

So Jimmy's phsycology teacher is trying to think of beginnig lessons for her phsycology class. so she gets up and says "class, i want u anyone who thinks they are stupid to stand up." nobody stood up. then Jimmy stands up. The teacher says "Jimmy, u think u are stupid?" Jimmy replies "No, i just felt bad with u standing up all alone."

What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Hopefully it made it over without lacerating its underbelly, thus causing fatal bleeding.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

Why did the old man have only one foot? Sadley, the other one was shot off in World War II and life hasnt been the same for him since.

Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

I have a black guy in my family tree? Yea, his still hanging their

What's the best Medieval job? A Jester because you get to play with balls all day.

What did the T-rex say to the velociraptor? Dinosaurs are extinct.

Civil Rights.

why did the chicken cross the road cause he was suicidal but a car just didnt happen to hit him.

A new restaurant KKKcake

Why did the bus crash? The driver was a tomato.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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