How do you kill a mocking bird? You throw an axe at it.

What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

knock knock Who's there? ... Hello?

What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

George: I see you got a haircut. Jim: No, I got them all cut.

what did one picture frame say to the other? Well you could answer with hows it hanging but thats not logical because they are inanimate

Girls

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem makes no sense FIRETOE!!!

this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

Why couldn't Bethany drive? She was 14.

Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes and noise and they are promptly found by the invading German soldiers. They are all shipped to Aushwitz where two of them are sent directly to the gas chambers where they are killed. The third Jew survives the Holocaust and is eventually liberated by Allied forces. He returns to his country only to find his house burnt to the ground. With no money or food, he starves to death by the side of the road and his body is eaten by various animals.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

I enjoy anal.

why was the boy's face burnt? a horrible accident involving a lighter and some hairspray

Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

Why couldn't the blonde fix the lightbulb? It was shattered.

How do you kill chuck norris? With a gun...from 40 feet away

Do you really want to know what i shit? Poo

What's the difference between 6th graders and Jews? 6th graders make it back from camp. :)

what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

Whats bloody and wrinkly? Your nans fanny

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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