Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

How do you turn a broken skateboard into a gleaming Rolls Royce? With magic.

Two boys are playing with a toy submarine. One isists it will work in a real test. The boy drowns and the company is sued.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Have you seen the movie "Constipation?" No. It hasn't come out yet! Of course there is no such movie in production and no plans for such a movie exist.

Why cant you see black people when you are playing hide and seek? Because they are in a very good hiding spot

A man with a ski mask leaves a jewelry store He then goes back because he accidentally took the clerk's pen

Person A - I farted Person B - YUCK

Penal Dysfunction

Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? It was moldy and it was a home of many roaches.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie

Two muslims walk into the bar, Everybody continues with their daily lives. One should not be judged by their race or religion as all humans on earth are as equal as one another and should be treated the same way..... And then the building blew up.

Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

Where would canada be without nature? still here

What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ask the starving African.

Why did the Afircan child die? He had AIDS.

What's worse than having amnesia? I don't remember.

What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...