How to you kill two birds with one stone? You use a precision hunting rifle to mortally wound two flying birds, then put them on a platform and break their skulls with one rock. Separately.

what did the blond do after she turned 18? Reelected Obama.

jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water jack collapsed because of serious drug abuse and stress jill followed after not being able to handle the tragedy of her brothers death this wouldn't have happened if they got into my van when i asked them too.

What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

Why did Billy drop his ice cream cone? Because he was hit by a truck.

The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

What's the difference between Wolfjob and a Jew? Wolfjob is attractive.

What's worse than dropping your icecream? Slavery

What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

why does column have a letter n?

The other day, I broke my snare drum.... I still haven't fixed it and am planning on doing so soon.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

why did the cow die because she ate poisoned apple pie

What do Jews suck? Because they lie, steal money, and start wars.

What did the boy do before school? Jacked off.

Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

Is this where I type the joke?

After a long romantic date with my girl friend I went home. Upon walking to my bathroom for a dootie i realize that I'm gay. So I break up with my girl friend and I am now in a wonderful relationship with Jose, He sell's sea shells at discount prices.

Whats the difference between a horse and a snake? A snake is poisons, a horse is not.

What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

When a suicide-bomber when to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

Do you know why children in Africa don't read Harry Potter too much? Because they can't read.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...