Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the best way to pick up girls? Lift with your legs, not your back.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Where did the little girl go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Have you ever had Ethiopian food before? No? Well neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a dead baby and a man? One's tall the other's not

thumb_up thumb_down +12

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Where's Waldo? It is impractical to search for him because he's just going to get lost on another page once you find him. You assume he was murdered and get on with your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

yo mama so fat, her favorite food is seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I have read and agree to the terms of service.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is the Pope's favourite dish to order from the local Indian take-away? Korma.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A Squirrel gets ready for hybernation. 21 You Stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Nikii manaj is 99.9% fake on her body

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how many A.D.D. kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?lets go play!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats worse than 12 babys stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 12 trees!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops